home will be where the heart is

i'm having a bit of an identity crisis, and i blame it all on uganda. I was not expecting to love Uganda as much as I do now. I loved it before I even went and I claimed to be obsessed with Africa, but those feelings of obsession and excitement don't even compare to the attachment I feel to my little Lugazi town. I loved living in Uganda. I felt so at home there. I loved every little thing about Uganda. Even the infuriating things like being taunted by boda drivers or getting ripped off with prices for taxi rides or going over 1,000 speed bumps in a huge bus were so hilarious and believe it or not, I really miss those things. Roads are too smooth in America and I am way too clean here, I miss having brown water come off of my hands when I wash them and running to the backyard to our welcoming (to us at least) little squatter.

I've always been in love with the song Home from Beauty and the Beast, but since being home from Uganda, the words of the song have a new meaning for me. In the wise words of Belle:

home will be where the heart is
never were words so true,
my heart's far, far away, home is too
....
what i'd give, to return
to the life that i knew lately
but i know that i can't
solve my problems going back

I love being back in the states where I can call my family whenever I want, and better yet see my family! But my heart is still in Uganda, and I think a piece of me always will be. I've spent the first couple of weeks of school wishing I was far away from here back in my (un)comfortable bed in Dr. Nyombi's house surrounded by people and places that I truly love. But I am realizing that I made so much progress in my life in a short 12 weeks abroad, and up until now I have unknowingly stopped my progress by spending so much of my time wishing I could go back.

So even though I still miss Uganda every single day and hope that I will be able to go back someday, I am going to start living in the now...making my life here better so that when I go back to Uganda, I will have even more to offer. The trick is...making provo feel like home...

annet and josiah, the greatest people ever. seriously.